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看笑話學英文 |
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把English
讀為"應給利息"的同學當了行長；
讀為"陰溝裡洗"的成了小菜販子；
讀為"因果聯繫"的成了哲學家；
讀為"硬改歷史"的成了政治家；
讀為"英國裡去"的成了海外華僑；
而我 不小心讀成了"應該累死"
結果成了公司職員......... |
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有天老師請小明用 "Green" , "Pink" , "Yellow" 三種顏色造句，
小明想了老半天，終於開口說話了：
"Green...Green...Green"..., I "pink" the phone and say "Yellow".
(正確應為 "Ring….Ring…Ring…, I pick the phone and say hello". ) |
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有天老師請小明用英文描述車禍，小明想了又想，
就說 "One car come, two cars bump, three cars O-E-O-E." |
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補充字彙：車禍 car accident 、救護車 ambulance |
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THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE：
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1) You believe in Santa Claus.
2) You don't believe in Santa Claus.
3) You are Santa Claus.
4) You look like Santa Claus. |
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SUCCESS： |
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At age 4 success is . . . not peeing in your pants.
At age 12 success is . . .having friends.
At age 17 success is . . . having a drivers license.
At age 35 success is . . . having money.
At age 50 success is . . .having money.
At age 70 success is . . . having a drivers license.
At age 75 success is . . . having friends.
At age 80 success is . . . not peeing in your pants.
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The Importance of the Second Language ~ 第二外語有多重要 |
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A cat chased a mouse into a hole and sat outside meowing. After a while, the mouse heard a dog barking and thought “Great! Now the dog is here. The cat must be gone.” So, the mouse came out checking the dog. As soon as he came out, he was caught by the cat again. He begged the cat ”Before you eat me, would you tell me one thing? Where is the dog barking here just now?” The cat answered in laugh “Don’t you know nowadays it’s very important to learn a second language?”
有一隻貓追著一隻老鼠，老鼠躲到洞內，小貓只好坐在洞外喵喵叫，等待老鼠出來。
過了一陣子，躲在洞內的老鼠聽到狗叫聲，心想狗來了，貓一定跑掉了，於是探出頭來看看，沒想到還是立刻被貓一把捉住。
老鼠向貓求情說：「在你吃掉我之前，我可以知道剛才那隻在叫的狗在哪？」
貓笑著說：「你難道不知道會說第二外語的重要嗎?」。 |
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道高一丈 |
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教授在教室黑板上寫著：
「I will meet the class at 5:00.」 （我會在五點來上課）
幾個剛到教室的學生看到留言，就開玩笑地把class的「c」擦掉，變成～
「I will meet the lass at 5:00.」（我會在五點會見情婦）
當教授回來看到黑板上的留言被修改後，
他拿起板擦，又把lass的「l」擦掉，變成～
「I will meet the ass at 5:00.」(我會在五點會見驢子)
然後對著學生說：「驢子們，上課了！」 |
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Interesting Comparisons 有趣的對比
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Smart man + Smart woman = Romance
Smart man + Dumb woman = Pregnancy
Dumb man + Smart woman = Affair
Dumb man + Dumb woman = Marriage
Smart boss + Smart employee = Profit
Smart boss + Dumb employee = Production
Dumb boss + Smart employee = Promotion
Dumb boss + Dumb employee = Overtime
A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need.
A successful man is one who makes more money
.. than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
Kids in the back seat cause accidents.
Accidents in the back seat cause kids.
Q: "What promises do a man and a woman make when
.... they get married?"
A: "A man and a woman promise to go through sickness,
.... illness and disease together.
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英文簡報五大流程 5 Easy steps |
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開場白
Opening |
Good morning, ladies and gentlemen, it’s my pleasure to be here.
各位先生女士們早安，很高興能在這裡。 |
Welcome to Time International Language Center, My name is ....
歡迎來到時代國際英日韓語，我是... |
Let’s begin with ......
我們就從......開始吧! |
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簡報主題
Main subject |
The topic of today’s presentation is ......
今天簡報的主題是...... |
I’d like to present the latest ......
我要向你們介紹最新的...... |
Today, I’d like to talk about......
今天我要談的是...... |
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簡報綱要及圖表說明
Outline and chart |
I’ve divided my presentation into three parts.
我將我的報告分為三部分 |
First, I’d like to begin with... / secondly / thirdly/ last but not the least
首先,我想先從...開始 / 第二點 / 第三點 / 最後一點 |
Let’s take a look at the next chart
讓我們看下一張圖表 |
I’d like you to take a look at this figure.
我想請大家看一下這個圖表 |
As you can see from this bar graph , ......
大家可以從這張圖看到... |
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問與答
Q & A |
Now, does anybody have a question?
有人現在有問題要提出的嗎? |
If you have any questions, please feel free to interrupt.
如果有任何問題,請隨時打斷我。 |
I would be happy to answer any questions now.
現在我很樂意回答任何問題 |
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結語
Closure |
| To sum up,… 做個總結 |
I’d like to conclude my presentation with a few points.
我想用以下幾點總結我的報告 |
| Thank you for your attention. 謝謝你的注意 |
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常用單字
useful vocabularies |
貼心的提醒
Tips |
| Brief (v.) 簡報 |
| Chart (n.)圖表 |
| Bar graph 長條圖 |
| Figure 統計圖表 |
| Interrupt (v.)打斷 |
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| Know your audience |
了解你的聽眾需求 |
| Make eye contact |
與聽眾保持視覺接觸 |
| Make it concise |
精簡的簡報 |
| Use visual aids or charts |
使用道具或圖表 |
| Volume and interaction |
音量適中並保持互動 |
| Time control |
留意時間限制 |
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實用電話英文 |
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你是否曾接到外國人電話,卻不知如何應答？
其實電話英文一點都不難，只要記下常用急救電話用語，你可以更自信大膽的說英文! |
自我介紹
Introduction
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Hello, this is Jane with Time International Language Center.
你好，我是時代國際英日韓語的珍. |
Hi. This is Jane returning your call.
嗨!我是珍，回電給你。 |
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接聽電話
Answering calls
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This is Time International Language Center. How may I help you?
這裡是時代國際英日韓語，有什麼我可以為你效勞的嗎？ |
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詢問某人
Asking for someone
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| May I speak to ... , please? 我想找... |
| I’d like to talk to ... 我想找... |
| I am trying to reach ... 我想找... |
Could you connect me to extension number 211?
請幫找轉接分機號碼211 |
| Hi, Julie. Are you free to talk? 嗨!茱莉，你方便說話嗎？ |
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說明來電目的
Explain the purpose
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| I am calling to... 我打來是為了... |
| I would like to talk to you about ... 我想找... |
| The reason I am calling is that ... 我打來的原因是... |
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了解來電者
Asking for callers
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| May I ask who's calling, please? 請問你哪裡找? |
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保留與轉接
Hold and transfer calls
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| Please hold on a second. 請等一下 |
One moment, please. I will transfer your call to ...
請稍等,我將轉接你的來電給… |
| Jessica is on line one. 潔西卡在1線. |
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無法接聽
Unable to answer the call
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| He is on another line right now. 他現在電話中 |
She is not in. Could you call again in 30 minutes?
她現在不在，你可以半小時後再打來嗎？ |
She is in a meeting. Would you like Jessica to return your call?
她在開會，你需要潔西卡回電嗎? |
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留言
Leave a message
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| Would you like to leave a message? 你想要留言嗎？ |
Please tell him Danny from Time International Language Center called.
請告訴他，時代國際英日韓語的丹尼來電。 |
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請求對方
Ask for something
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| May I leave a message? 我可以留言嗎? |
My English is not very good. Could you please speak more slowly?"
我的英文不是很好，可以請你說慢一點嗎？ |
I can’t hear you well. Could you please speak louder.
我聽不太清楚，可以請你大聲一點嗎？ |
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旅遊必備英文 Top 10 Travel English |
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| Could you tell me where the train station is？ |
請問火車站怎麼走？ |
| Excuse me. Could I have … |
不好意思,可以給我... |
| How much is this？ |
這個多少錢？ |
| I’m here on business. |
我來這裡的目的是出差 |
| Excuse me. Is there a washroom nearby？ |
不好意思,請問這附近有洗手間嗎？ |
| Where can I get some money changed？ |
請問哪裡可兌換錢？ |
| I have a reservation for ... |
我有預約... |
| Do you accept credit card？ |
你們接受信用卡付款嗎？ |
| I am looking for ... |
我在找... |
| What would you like to drink？ |
你要喝什麼呢？ |
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最受歡迎的女生英文名字 |
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| Name(英文名) |
Translation (翻譯) |
meaning (典故) |
| Amy |
艾咪 |
可愛的、心愛的人 |
| Annie |
安妮 |
仁慈的上帝 |
| Catherine |
凱薩琳 |
純潔的 |
| Doris |
桃樂絲 |
屬於大海的 |
| Emily |
艾蜜莉 |
和藹可親的 |
| Eva |
伊凡 |
生命、生氣蓬勃的 |
| Helen |
海倫 |
光彩照人的美女 |
| Irene |
艾琳 |
和平女神 |
| Jennifer |
珍妮弗 |
白色的波浪 |
| Jessica |
傑西卡 |
上帝的恩寵 |
| Sharon |
雪倫 |
很美的公主 |
| Sophia |
蘇菲雅 |
智慧 |
| Teresa |
泰瑞莎 |
收穫、收穫者 |
| Tina |
蒂娜 |
基督的追隨者 |
| Vanessa |
凡妮莎 |
蝴蝶、上帝的恩惠 |
| Vivian |
薇薇安 |
活潑的 |
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最受歡迎的男生英文名字 |
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| Name(英文名) |
Translation (翻譯) |
meaning (典故) |
| Adam |
亞當 |
用紅土做的男人 |
| Andrew |
安德魯 |
有男子氣慨的 |
| Brian |
布萊恩 |
強健的 |
| Daniel |
丹尼爾 |
上帝是審判者 |
| David |
大衛 |
可愛的 |
| Jack |
傑克 |
上帝的恩賜 |
| James |
詹姆士 |
追隨者 |
| Joseph |
約瑟夫 |
願上帝增強 |
| Kevin |
凱文 |
高貴的血統 |
| Michael |
麥可
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像上帝一樣的人 |
| Peter |
彼得 |
岩石、堅強的人 |
| Robert |
羅伯特 |
名望 |
| Richard |
理查 |
嚴厲的國王 |
| Steven |
史蒂文 |
王冠、花冠 |
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你知道美語和英語的差異嗎？ |
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| 中譯 |
American English
美語 |
British English
英語 |
中譯 |
American English
美語 |
British English
英語 |
| 中心,中央 |
center |
centre |
秋天 |
fall |
autumn |
| 顏色 |
color |
colour |
餅干 |
cookie |
biscuit |
| 勞工 |
labor |
labour |
行李 |
luggage |
baggage |
| 組織 |
organize |
organise |
汽車 |
automobile |
car |
| 了解 |
realize |
realise |
薯條 |
French fries |
chips |
| 電影院 |
theater |
theatre |
公寓 |
apartment |
flat |
| 水龍頭 |
faucet |
tap |
足球 |
soccer |
football |
| 電影院 |
cinema |
movie theater |
一樓 |
first floor |
ground floor |
| 人行道 |
sidewalk |
pavement |
電梯 |
elevator |
lift |
| 汽油 |
gasoline |
petrol |
卡車 |
truck
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lorry |
| 橡皮擦 |
eraser |
rubber |
寄信 |
post |
mail |
| 商店 |
store |
shop |
長褲 |
pants |
trousers |
| 糖果 |
candy |
sweets |
藥房 |
pharmacy |
chemist |
| 地下鐵 |
subway |
tube |
drugstore |
| underground |
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為何英文這麼難學呢？ |
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| There's no eggs in eggplants, nor ham in hamburgers, neither apples nor pines in pineapples. |
eggplant 茄子
hamburger 漢堡
pineapple 鳳梨 |
| And while no one knows what is in a hot-dog,you can be pretty sure it isn't canine. |
hotdog 熱狗 |
| English muffins were not invented in England nor French fries in France. |
English muffin
英式蛋糕
French fries 薯條 |
| Sweetmeats are candies, while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat. |
sweetmeat 糖果
sweetbread
(小牛的) 胰臟 |
| But if we explore its paradoxes,we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square,and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. |
quicksand 流沙
boxing ring
拳擊競技場
guinea pig 天竺鼠
Guinea 幾內亞 |
| And why is it that writers write, but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce, and hammers don't ham? |
writer 作家
finger 手指
grocer 食品雜貨商 |
| If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth, beeth? |
booth 攤子, 棚子 |
| One goose, 2 geese. So, one moose, 2 meese? Is cheese the plural of choose? |
goose, geese 鴨子
moose 麋鹿 |
| One mouse, 2 mice. One louse, 2 lice. One house, 2 hice? |
louse, lice 寄生蟲 |
If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught?
If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? |
preach 傳教者
humanitarian
人道主義者 |
| Why do people recite at a play, and play at a recital? |
recite 朗誦
recital 演奏會 |
| Ship by truck or car and send cargo by ship? |
cargo 貨物 |
| Have noses that run and feet that smell? |
running nose流鼻水
smelly feet 臭腳 |
| Park on driveways and drive on parkways? |
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| How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites? |
wise guy
自作聰明的人 |
| How can the weather be hot as Hell one day and cold as Hell another? |
Hell 地獄 |
| When a house burns up, it burns down. |
burn up=burn down
火燒 |
| You fill in a form by filling it out and an alarm clock goes off by going on. |
fill in=fill out 填寫
go off 設定使出聲 |
| You get in and out of a car, yet you get on and off a bus. |
get in 上 (小型)車
get out off 下 (小型)車
get on 上 (公) 車
get off 下 (公) 車 |
| When the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible. |
visible 可見的
invisible 看不見 |
| And why, when I wind up my watch, I start it,but when I wind up this essay, I end it? |
wind up 上緊發條,結束 |
資料來源： The Ultimate Joy Ride through Our Language by Richard Lederer
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繞口令Tongue Twister |
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Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled pepper.
Did Peter Piper pick a peck of pickled pepper?
If Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled pepper, where is the peck of pickled pepper Peter Piper picked?
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實用英語單字 |
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在我們的日常生活中，一些日用品的英文說法, 就是借用其出產公司名稱，這一些都是很 in 的說英文說法，要學起來喔！ |
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| Band-Aid |
OK 繃 |
Coca-Cola |
可樂 |
Ping-Pong |
乒乓球 |
| Frisbee |
飛盤 |
Q-Tips |
棉花棒 |
Jeep |
吉普車 |
| Jell-O |
果凍 |
Scotch Tape |
隱形膠帶 |
Kleenex |
衛生紙 |
| Kodak |
小型照相機 |
Levi's |
牛仔褲 |
Vaseline |
凡士林 |
| Xerox |
影印機 |
Walkman |
隨身聽 |
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英文線上字典 |
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英文面試十大必問問題 |
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| 1.Tell me about yourself./ How would a friend describe you? |
| 請自我介紹。你的朋友怎麼形容你呢？ |
| 自我介紹或自述屬開放性問題，可透露出許多訊息，諸如表達能力？是不是很自我？有沒有自信？會不會過於驕傲或自卑？可以讓人留下一個好印象。所以，一定要準備好至少3分鐘的自我介紹內容，表達自己善於與人合作、正面積極樂觀的形象。例如：提到成就時不忘感謝自己的父母師長、說明自己擔任班級 或社團幹部經歷、將曾遇過的挫折視為成長學習的最佳良機等。 |
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| 2.Why do you like to apply for this job? |
| 您為何應徵這份工作呢？ |
| 這個問題主要在瞭解應徵者是不是真的知道自己應徵的是什麼樣的工作？對這份工作的想像為何？亦可透漏出應徵者對這份工作的熟悉度及企圖心。所以，不要不做任何準備就亂槍打鳥找工作，蒐集工作資訊是必要的功課，但是，如果真的不清楚的地方，也不要自我想像，避免造成反效果。簡要說明對工作的基本了解後，引用過去的工作經驗或學習經驗，表達自己足以適任、勝任的各項條件，傳達你的企圖心。 |
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| 3. Why do you resign from your previous company? |
| 您前些工作離職的原因是什麼呢？ |
| 這跟與舊情人分手一樣，千萬不可口出惡言，談論是非。這個問題通常想藉由你過去的工作狀況，了解你對領導的服從及與同事相處的狀況。這時，別忘感謝舊公司長官栽培及同事提攜，離職純屬個人因素或積極正面的原因，例如：搬家、家庭因素、想接受更大的挑戰、貴公司發展的走向正是自己的理想等。 |
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| 4 .What do you like and dislike your previous job? |
| 對您的前一份工作，您喜歡或不喜歡哪些部份呢？ |
| 每個人對工作都有偏好，沒有對與錯，不過在應徵工作時，一般公司通常喜歡個性合群、正面的員工，可以在此時適當表達自己喜歡的工作型態，不喜歡的部份則不提及，或是不表示意見，例如：最喜歡團隊合作默契和工作氣氛，可以激發大家的創意，從中學習許多溝通技巧。當然工作也會有不盡如人意的地方，但是我樂意把它當成挑戰去克服，常常發現因此而得到更多。 |
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| 5. What’s your strength and weakness? |
| 談談您的優缺點，擅長與不擅長的是什麼？ |
| 這個問題可以看出應徵者的個性特質和誠實與否，自認有太多優點或太多缺點，都是不好的。可以將自己的強項自信地表達出來，並舉具體的實例佐證，再中肯說明自己不足之處，並強調正在改進中，記住，需避免提及對這份工作適任性有影響的缺點。 |
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| 6. What’s your future career plan? |
| 您未來的職場生涯規劃是什麼？ |
| 別以為公司真的有興趣聽你的規劃，這個問題背後的用意是瞭解你有沒有長期待下來的打算，一般公司都希望員工流動性低，人才養成不易，能讓公司相信你會久待的想法是很重要的。可以依這份工作規劃你的展望，例如：希望未來五年內，可以累積實務經驗，未來可以獨當一面，擔任團隊領導的工作，並有能力擔任更艱鉅的職務。 |
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| 7. How much do you know about our company? |
| 您對我們的公司有多少了解呢？ |
| 基本上老闆想要一個對公司業務了解的人，這表現了你的企圖心及警慎的態度，事前蒐集資訊可以讓你游刃有餘，但是不要只會覆述網站上的資料，要加入一些自己的觀察，當然你不可能像真正的員工這麼了解公司，所以，等你的陳述完畢後，也可反問；「我剛剛是從局外人的觀點來說，您認為我是否漏掉了什麼？」，反客為主取得更多工作的資訊。 |
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| 8. Tell me about a time when you had to solve a difficult problem. |
| 請描述一個你處理過的難題。 |
| 危機處理是一個很重要的能力，事先想好一個事件，從狀況發生、發現問題、解決問題到影響評估，藉以突顯你的能力，老闆要了解的是，你是否能看到真正的問題、採取的方式是否適當、對事件的評估為何，所以，記得預作準備，舉例：之前公司在競標案子時，由我負責簡報，結果處理檔案的工程師，沒將最終的簡報檔案帶至現場，僅有最初的簡報草稿，見他極度自責與不知所措，我馬上聯絡公司同事儘速將新的檔案送過來，需等待的20分鐘裡，我瀏覽了手邊的舊檔案，決定簡報準時開始，將之分為兩段，第一段完畢後，請同事利用停頓的時間用來換裝新檔案，我則以口述的方式指導評審參看書面資料，做進一步說明，接著繼續第二段，整體流程順暢，最後有驚無險的度過。回公司後，我主動邀請了那位處理檔案的工程師吃飯，謝謝他幫忙我準備簡報資料，並告知我也有責任作再次檢查，所以是我們大家的疏失，請他不用介意，下次還要再麻煩他，見他如釋重負，我相信這個經驗，讓我們都有成長。 |
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| 9. What are your interests outside of work? |
| 工作之餘，你有什麼興趣？ |
| 國外很重視一個人的休閒興趣，如果是從事社會服務工作者更佳，因為一般認為，這樣的人會對工作有責任感。所以，除了真正的興趣外，別忘說明一些你參與的志願服務工作，例如：捐血、響應一日捐、紅十字會、社區服務等。那個~~公益彩卷還是不要提好了~~。 |
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| 10.Do you have any question about our company or this job? |
| 您對我們的公司或這份工作有任何疑問嗎？ |
| 這個問題通常意味著面試要結束了，不要想說快快結束就默不作聲，無論如何，趁此時開口謝謝公司給你這次面試機會，並提出你的疑問。主動提出問題和表達自己的想法，可以展現你積極的態度，並表現你有充分準備，所以，準備幾個問題吧!! |
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單字充電站 |
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在我們的日常生活中， 一些日用品的英文說法，就是借用其出產公司名稱，這一些都是很in(時髦)的說英文說法，要學起來喔! |
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| Band-Aid |
OK繃 |
Levi's |
牛仔褲 |
| Scotch Tape |
隱形膠帶 |
Q-Tips |
棉花棒 |
| Coca-Cola / Coke |
可樂 |
Vaseline |
凡士林 |
| Kleenex |
衛生紙 |
Jeep |
吉普車 |
| Ping-Pong |
乒乓球 |
Xerox |
影印機 |
| Kodak |
小型照相機 |
Jell-O |
果凍 |
| Frisbee |
飛盤 |
Walkman |
隨身聽 |
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Mother's Day is on the 2nd Sunday of May. What about Father's Day?
母親節是五月的第二個星期日，那父親節呢 ? |
In Taiwan, Mother's Day is on the 2nd Sunday of May
and Father's Day is on August 8th. However, Americans
celebrate their Father's Day on the 3rd Sunday of
June. The idea of Father's Day was proposed by a daughter
of William Smart. William raised up six children by
himself after his wife died in childbirth with their
6th child. His daughter realized his father's strength
and selflessness as a single parent, so she proposed
such a day for all fathers.
在台灣，母親節是五月的第二個星期二，父親節則是8月8日。然而，美國人是在每年六月的第三個星期二慶祝父親節。父親節的這個想法是由威廉史密斯的女兒所提出的。在威廉的太太死於第六胎分娩之後，威廉獨自扶養起六個小孩。威廉的女兒感受到他父親身為一個單親父親的力量和無私，所以提出這一天來獻給天下父親。 |
故事中提到了兩種日期的寫法
1. the 2nd Sunday of May – 五月的第二個星期天
the 3rd Sunday of June– 六月的第三個星期天
2. August 8th 8月8日
所以，如果要用第一種方法寫日期的話，August 8th = the 8th of August |
propose an idea 提出一個想法
propose 也有另一個意思，就是求婚 。可以看看以下的這個用法
Linda: Let me tell you a secret, George proposed to
me yesterday.
Kathy: Oh my God! Did he? Congratulations! So, did
you accept his proposal?
Linda: I think I need more time. |
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